I never wanted the realm.
And yet, for some reason, I kept taking more and more of it.
Seven years after Okehazama, I had somehow gotten my hands on the whole of Mino, the province next door. I had taken Inabayama Castle, the Saito stronghold, and brought the entire province of Mino under the Oda banner.
My retainers were jubilant.
"At last, Mino is ours."
"Lord of one province, Owari, and now lord of two. Our lord's conquest of the realm has truly begun."
They all looked up at me with shining eyes as they said it. The council chamber was full of the heat of victory. Where would we take next? Where would we march next? My retainers traded bold words one after another.
I was afraid of those eyes, of that heat. They all wanted something from me. Win more. Take more. Grow bigger. Not one of them would say, "That is enough, my lord."
Please don't misunderstand.
I didn't want Mino. I was just scared. Mino sits right beside Owari. If they came at us, my head would be in danger in no time.
Even lying in bed at night, I'd think it. —What if Saito's men are creeping across the border right now? What if by morning there's a blade at my throat?
When I thought about it, I couldn't stop shaking. So I attacked before I could be attacked. I tried to whittle down their strength before they could kill me. That was all it was.
And yet. While I was thrashing about, desperately trying to protect myself, I looked up and found my lands had doubled.
When word came that the castle had fallen, I didn't rejoice. I went pale.
Oh no. It's grown again.
More land to defend. More men coming to serve me. And—more people to envy me and target me. For me, more territory meant a bigger target with myself painted on it.
The Saito men were strong. They hadn't lost out of carelessness. They were the hardy, cunning warriors of Mino, tempered since the days of Lord Dosan. It took years to bring them down.
I couldn't bring myself to look down on them. They were simply unlucky. They had happened to live next door to a cowardly, far-too-desperate man like me, and that was all.
Looking up at the castle I'd taken, I let out a breath. Now I'd be able to sleep at night for a while. I tried to think so.
But as I gazed at the castle, an unpleasant thought crossed my mind. Having taken Mino meant that from now on I would have to defend Mino.
Mino had other neighbors. Someday those neighbors would want Mino. When that happened, I'd be attacked again. And when I was attacked, I'd lie awake counting the nights in fear again.
I could take and take, and it would never end. If anything, the more I took, the longer the borders I had to guard became, and the more places I touched an enemy.
Far from feeling safe after taking the castle—I was much more scared than before.
In a corner of my heart, I already knew.
Win, and your lands grow.
Your lands grow, and so do your enemies.
Your enemies grow, and you have to fight again.
And so, with every victory, it gets harder to step down.
The truth was, I wanted to step down somewhere along the way. I wanted to say to someone, "That's enough. I need no more than this."
But this staircase—only went up.